Betty Grumble Interview

Betty Grumble

By Lee Bemrose

If you haven't experienced Betty Grumble, you should. If you think you could come up with a creation like Betty Grumble, you can't, unless you are Emma Maye Gibson, because Betty is the most unique force of Sex Clown you will ever behold. And she is here to delight and entertain you and save the world with her fierce love and loving anger.



First up, thank you for taking the time to answer yet more questions. Do you ever get tired of answering questions about yourself? Or do you enjoy this part of the process?

I enjoy the experience. The conversation that art creates should have many tendrils across many mediums. Debate and dialogue encircle practice and we do love a good yarn.

Does the introspection of being asked questions about the nature of your character affect the nature of your character?

It depends on the line of questioning, the mood, the moment. Sometimes you feel strong enough to free dive deep down into your guts for some hard truths. Sometimes you just wanna wriggle across into some solitude. Asking questions about being asked questions is proving trippy today… But I like it.

I have to confess that I chose an email Q & A over a face-to-face because the prospect of meeting Betty Grumble in the flesh is kind of intimidating. Do you find Betty is generally an intimidating presence? Why/why not?

Betty can have that effect. She is a large energy, a fleshy, sensual beast. Some people are drawn into her laugh, some are arrested by it. She allows space for all of these responses and they are all valid. She is monstrous in her way, simultaneous war mask and children’s toy. Betty is going to mean different things for different experiences of the world. The overriding response is ‘give us a squeeze’ but the tension of Grumble’s inner workings - her love and anger - her comedy and horror - gives birth to a storm of energy. She’s a primal one, so I can understand how locking eyes in the jungle with a mythic maiden may induce a quiver. She’s a lover though, first and foremost, there’s always time to sniff each other out. No shame in watching from a distance though… Or not at all.

This is for both of you: What does Betty think of Emma Maye, and what does Emma Maye think of Betty? What aspect of the other do you like/dislike etc. Please answer as though the other was not in the room.

Emma Maye has always spoken about Betty as a survival mechanism. She’s an invocation of the sacred Glamour Spell that has long histories stretching through drag and shamanism. Emma Maye laughs and weeps alongside Betty. Betty gives Emma Maye space to see herself. The mask says ‘look at me’ but also, ‘don’t look at me’. It’s not a mirror so much as a water source, which reflects but you can also submerge into and swim in the other. You have to respect it though, as it can take you under… Performance Art & Sex Clown legend Glitta Supernova calls this phenomenon ‘SHOWCOSIS’. There are healthy and unhealthy cases of Showcosis, where like with any magic, you can go too deep or too far from the spirit into ego. ‘Alright, I’m ready for my close-up, Mr Demille.’ The stage is powerful, you have to respect it. Betty loves Emma Maye, she’s been watching her for some time.

Do you ever have creative differences? If so, how do you resolve these differences?

We have a pretty good symbiotic relationship. You could probably trace a battle of aesthetics through photographs of earlier performances to now. We work a lot with taboo, I think we have learnt a lot about listening to instinct and the world around, together. We have made mistakes together. We try not to chastise each other for it, it’s part of the process. We are open to learning. We are also proud of each other.

Your new show is called Love & Anger. The word I most associate with love is hate. Why Love & Anger?

Anger can be righteous. It’s a moving energy. I feel like hate has arrested itself. It’s stuck. As women, we are often told to ‘calm down’, that we are hysterical or crazy. I think women have a lot of anger, and its justified, we have lived and are living in an ongoing femicide. The feminine spirit has been under attack. The anger we have is in response to this, in can help us, empower us, protect us, ready us for battle, it can also connect us to the sisterhood. The anger doesn’t eat itself or go rancid, it constantly renews itself because it’s so connected to love energy. We are only so angry because we are so full of love, because we know innately how things can be and that the balance is out.

What kind of things stir feelings of love in the heart of Betty Grumble?

Nature, GAIA BABY YEAH. Oh, ole Grumble bum is always perving on the world around, loving that kookaburra cracking itself up on the branch of the white gum. The wind whipping around your thighs, the breath of fellow dancers on a dance floor going in and out. Tenderness incarnate in the human spirit, the resilience of people, the difference in people. I LOVE IT. Betty loves to move and be moved, she loves fantasising about the endless possibilities, thick musical beat, her biological and logical family. Animals, the ecosystem. CAVES! RAIN! It’s raining as we write this now and we want to throw ourselves into the day, mouth open. Love is lurve and love and love and love.

And anger?

People who try and control other people’s bodies… Or the body of the Earth. Fuck you. Fuck a government so corrupt and conservative they don’t even bury their bigotry, they air it with the kind of arrogance we though we left behind post WWII. Enemies of Grooviness - EAT SHIT.

What are your thoughts on hate?

Hate is going to be born out of fear or trauma. Hate is something we need to face and talk about. There’s too much hate disguised as justice. Not everyone needs to live the same life, but we need to live freely, the lives we desire and deserve. Identify those stepping on the throats of others.

You use the word ecosexual, and there is a theme of the impact humans are having on our fragile ecosystem in your work… what do you think is the fate of humankind?

Part of me believes in the ‘volunteer human extinction program’… That we will suffer the consequence of our selfishness as a species and rightly so… Part of me wants the revolution of consciousness to bring us into harmony with the cosmos. Can it be? I find comfort in the idea that Utopia is in the Struggle, that there is a space for us to live in the here and now in the reaching for the groovier future.

Emma Maye - do you ever forget you are not behind your Betty mask and do or say something that is pure Betty in off-stage reality?

No.

Do you think it would be healthy for everyone to have an alter-ego?

I think its healthy for people to play. Our child spirits need to live in us, too many have been stomped out. It’s all dress ups.

I understand that the name Betty Grumble was inspired by Emma’s grandparents. What would they think about your shows?

Realistically they would be shocked. Now they have passed into the spirit realm, I think they would find it all very funny. I think my Aunty, Lynda Gibson would be laughing the hardest up there, she is a big inspiration to me and I think processed the world a similar way to how I do. She was their daughter and I’m their grand daughter, it’s all connected.

Do you ever see faces in the audience that are genuinely shocked by what they are seeing?

If I’m lucky!

Part of the reason I want to see Love & Anger is to find out if this performance really is as hilarious and outrageous as I remember the last one being. What kind of experience are we in for this time?

Thank you! This is an ongoing womanifesto I say, so you can expect a similar approach to the body and fun, of seriousness colliding with surreal stupidity. You can anticipate seeing Betty shift in different ways, there is a deeper autobiographical approach to this go at it. I’m proud to bring this ceremony to Melbourne, the last run was very loving and I think we are going to make a lot of fun and noise together.

Finally, can you (either of you) tell us something about Betty Grumble you’ve never told anyone before?

She gets scared sometimes. 

Juliette Burton's Look At Me, Adelaide Fringe 2016

Juliette Burton – Look At Me

By Lee Bemrose

Arts festivals anywhere in the world are competitive beasts. It can be tough to get a gig and even tougher to get an audience, let alone rave reviews. To achieve a sold-out season and a chorus of rave reviews at the big daddy of all festivals – The Edinburgh Fringe – you have to be doing something right. One person who has just done all of the above is UK actor, writer and performer Juliette Burton with her latest show Look At Me. Other capitals like Sydney and Melbourne are missing out big time, but heads up Adelaide – Juliette is returning for another appearance at The Adelaide Fringe. If you like world class comedy with a big heart, read on.


So, Juliette, how has life been treating you lately?Life has been treating me like a pet; sometimes it gives me juicy bones, takes me for walks and my little tail is wagging, and other times life leaves me at home scratching on the door howling and making a mess of the cushions. Ups and downs but mainly juicy bones of ups!

How happy were you with how the show was received at the Edinburgh Fringe?Ecstatic! That's an underused word isn't it: "ecstatic"? Great word. Anyway, Look At Me premiered at Edinburgh Fringe 2014, getting 5 star reviews in national press, having sold out shows and at Edinburgh 2015 it had a total sold out run - every ticket that could be sold was. It was incredible. A big juicy bone two years in a row.

What's it like performing at that particular festival compared to others you've appeared at? 
Performing at different festivals is like gathering a collection of friends all from the same family; you have Edinburgh Fringe which is the biggest arts festival in the world and why I even began in this career. It's the BOSS of all festivals, so boss I actually moved to the city because I loved it so much. Edinburgh's my best mate, in a way; that mate who challenges you and helps you realise the best of yourself. Brighton Fringe is like Edinburgh's kid sister; fun, arty, lovely but much smaller. Melbourne International Comedy Festival was like the cool hipster cousin who I loved being around and fancied a little bit. And then there's Adelaide who's the second largest arts festival in the world - the festival who's chilled, laid back and SO much fun! Adelaide just wants to have a good time and I'm ready to be a part of that again!

Have the audiences at the different festivals been noticeably different in any ways?People the world over can be amazing. I think it's one of my favourite things, realising that an audience in one part of the world can be just as fun, vocal and up for it as an audience in a totally different part of the world - similar characters pop up in different corners of a country or the globe. I’ve made good friends in Edinburgh who are so similar to those in York. I’ve made good friends in Adelaide who were so similar to those in London. And friends in Melbourne who remind me of those in Cambridge. We’re all connected, we’re all the same really, if you focus on the similarities and not the differences.

Tell us a little about Look At Me. What's it all about? How did it come about?

I first had the idea back in 2007 – what would happen if I swapped my body for other bodies, having been the same girl in so many different bodies naturally. I’ve been a size 4 (US size 0) due to anorexia, a size 20 (US size 16) due to compulsive overeating disorder, I’ve been a “healthy” size but ill with bulimia and I’ve been a “normal” size and struggled with hidden illnesses like depression and anxiety. It got me thinking – is what we appear to be who we really are? I started chatting with friends about the idea and everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, I spoke to had a story about how they relate to their bodies and the outside world. And judgement too. So when the Arts Council in the UK gave me some money to change my looks in lots of dramatic ways I leapt at the chance to become, for a day, a 90 year old lady, a man, I wore the hijab, dressed “provocatively” and revisited my obese self – to find out how much appearances affect who we are on the inside. 
  
What were those experiences like? Any surprises there? 
A LOT of surprises! I don’t want to give away any spoilers but being a man unleashed some hidden sides of myself! Let’s just say perhaps confidence verged into arrogance… Revisiting my obese body surprised quite a few of my friends in fact…one of my friends didn’t even recognise me and other friends who have seen the show fancied me MORE in that disguise… And I wanted to reclaim my experience of that body on that day. And being a 90 year old lady revealed some truths; I felt rather liberated in some ways! To see just how liberated you will need to join me at the show!

The subject matter is, when you get down to it, pretty serious stuff. How difficult was it to work it into comedy?
 Not terribly difficult. Some of the experiences I went through were so bizarre that the only way to communicate them to audiences is with honesty and laughter. Looks will change all the time and youth will fade, it’s life’s great joke that we assign any real “value” in our appearances and yet we do and we’re encouraged to do so. Reflecting that judgement call through the show reveals the comedy in ourselves and also in the absurdity of my own experiences. We all have a day when someone judges us on appearance and the best we can do is laugh about it.

Some of the people you interview are dealing with some serious issues... how did they react when they found out your show was a comedy?
For the show I didn’t want it to be just my voice, so I interviewed a lot of people, which I do for all my shows, to make sure the questions I’m asking are universal as well as personal. For Look At Me I interviewed 80 year old men and women, physically disabled friends, thalidomide men, facially disfigured dudes, professional models, fellow weirdo performers, transgender people about how they relate to their bodies and how others relate to them.

When I told these people I was interviewing my show was a comedy, I told them well before I interviewed them, and they all unanimously loved the idea! I think we’ve all thought how ridiculous it is to judge on appearances; and as one of my interviewees said “Other people’s ignorance is not and never will be my problem. And if other people think that because of the way I look I can’t do certain things, well, watch me!”

Watch us! We are so much more than others and even we ourselves might think we are.
 
We know how the critics and audiences have responded to the show; what have been the responses of the interviewees? 
The interviewees have their own mailing list who I email first to let them know of future shows. I believe almost every interviewee featured in the show has now seen the show…bar one. And that one lives in Australia. So I hope they can come along!

All the interviewees who have seen it have loved it; it’s their show as well as mine in many ways. It’s everyone’s show who sees it and takes something from it. An audience affects a show far more than we realise. 

What are a couple of highlights for you in the interviews?
 Other than the incredible Adam Pearson, who I met thanks to the interviews for this show and I now count as one of my best friends… we once got so drunk that he ate a whole sharing sundae by himself. And we’ve shared some pretty dirty Cards Against Humanity games… other than him, there’s Geoff Adams-Spink who I met during my time working at the BBC, a wise, funny, irreverent man affected by the thalidomide drug. And there's Simon Minty who runs Abnormally Funny People. He says his condition (he’s 3 ft 11) is one thing but his disability is how people react to him. There’s also John Lyons, an 80-something year old poet, artist and author who says he thinks about life, not age – with ALL my interviewees I watch their interviews with the audience in the show and every single time I’m struck by the collective wisdom of my friends! It’s a treat to watch these pearls of wisdom back to remind me to listen to them and adopt their experience myself!  

Don't tell anyone this, but when I saw your wonderful show When I Grow Up at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival in 2014, I almost cried. It was heart-breaking to see what you had gone through, but ultimately one of the most uplifting (and funny) shows I had ever seen. How do your shows affect you during the performances? 
Wow. Thank you. That’s a wonderful thing to share and say aloud. Well, not aloud. This is written text. But you know, I heard it in my head so we’re totally connected like that. Anyway, what was the question? How do the shows affect me during the performance. Honestly, every single performance I get emotionally vulnerable and raw. But I count that as a victory because if I get to a point where I can be so honest and vulnerable with an audience then we must be really connecting, not as performer to audience but as human to human. I’m often asked how I perform if I’m struggling with my mental health problems and I always say because I know that as awful as I might feel before the show, I will feel amazing on the other side, because I’ve connected with a whole room of people who are with me on that journey… we’re in it together. 

 
How do you feel about humanity generally? Are we getting any better at being human or are we still a bit shit?
What a question! I don’t pretend to know the answer to that. I have to, for sanity’s sake, believe in the good in humanity. For every awful act that happens or hits us personally or hits the headlines there are so many people out there who will choose the path of kindness. There have been some shitty things happen in the world in the past couple of years since I last came to Australia and each time I have an increasingly greyer view of the world… and then a greater, stronger, brighter revision of that – when I see the power of loveliness rush through in the wake of shittiness.

A news story I was involved in in May 2015 is one of those weird news stories, It affected many and affected me personally. I relapsed badly because of it. But then the rush of humanity overwhelmed me. And it was immense. I talk about it in the show; we’re never really alone. It just takes bravery to be honest about how we’re really doing. Once I got on stage and started making jokes about the situation, hearing people laugh about what I’d been through I immediately knew it was going to be ok.
 
You are coming all the way to Australia but not taking the show to Melbourne or Sydney. This is a bummer for Melbourne and Sydney – any chance this could change?
 I would LOVE to return to Melbourne one day and visit Sydney for the first time… Let’s all keep our fingers crossed, and perhaps if this Adelaide fringe goes well I can venture a bit further in the future!

Norman Gunston Interview With Sally Struthers... Inspirational.

As a serious student of the celebrity interview, this has always been my favourite. Just saw it again on a comedy doco after a million years, and I still love it so much that tears got in my eyes. I fucking love this.

Grumpy With Mark Gambino

Grumpy With Mark Gambino

By Lee Bemrose 

Say hello to Mark Gambino. A random contributor to a magazine I once worked for when I felt like a fraud with no qualifications... primarily because I was a fraud with no qualifications. But I did seem to have a knack for spotting good writers. Lord knows whe had some terrible contributors, but one of the joys of that job was sorting through the  endless hopefuls and finding those few that really stood out.

What I liked most in potential contributors were the people that weren't afraid to do something different. That outside the square thing? That slightly not-what-I-was-expecting thing? If they did that, retained integrity to the topic and managed to make me smile, they were in.

In keeping with that ethos, here is an interview that didn't take place. Mark sent me a hastily written bio which answered all my questions before I asked them, therefore making the entire task of actually asking questions somewhat redundant. So what you have here is a series of imagined questions to real answers to unasked questions.

Read on. It's a rollercoaster of a ride.

 

Would you say the way you have been living your life has been very fulfilling?

Like many smart people, I’ve been able to comfortably get by in life by not doing very much. I realised recently that this is not a very fulfilling way to live. Since then I’ve focussed on following my passions and working my arse off, to very inspiring results. But where did it all begin?

That's a really great question, Mark. I was just about to ask you that very same thing. So tell us – where did your creative life begin?

My creative life began around 2001, after picking up a free street mag called Drink. It was about Melbourne bar culture. I thought I could write for it, so I pitched the editor. 

But wait on just a minute... did you have any real idea of how this writing business worked? Had you studied journalism?

At this point, having studied performing arts at university, I didn’t know how this writing business worked. But I could ACT like a writer.

I like your style. So you pitched to the editor of a booze mag. What happened?

She gave me a shot, and I began writing bar reviews. For free.

And then what happened?

I then picked up a Sydney dance music mag called 3D World.

Ah. 3D World. I think I've heard of it. What happened there? I hear they worked their staff and their freelancers like Trojans.

I pitched the managing ed, who passed me onto the editor - a guy called Grumpy - whereupon we started a nice conversation about Withnail and I. A friendship was born. I honed my craft working on this mag, writing everything from social commentary to a short-lived section of Melbourne bar reviews. I was given more credit than I deserved, but I worked like a Trojan for it.

Then what happened?

Then shit got real.

Oh no. I once saw that on a bumper sticker on the back of a ute... “Then Shit Got Real.” But you are a creative type. Can't imagine you driving a ute around.

I pitched a local fashion magazine (in Melbourne) and picked up some freelance work. It was then that I bought my first digital camera, and started taking photos to go with the articles I wrote. The publisher loved that they got two jobs for the price of one from me, and brought me on board to write, edit, shoot and distribute (I drove a fucking ute around and hand delivered the first issue)of a new sports magazine, Cinq. The irony is, I knew nothing about sport. In fact, I hated it. With a passion. You could say, when the subject of sport came up, I was passionate. It was certainly the best of times.

What else were you doing around this time?

During this time I also worked on General Pants’ Our People magazine. A thinly veiled marketing tool designed to pump what little money kids had out of their pockets and into the coffers or a corporate entity masquerading as a ‘youth brand.’ They weren’t the first. They certainly won’t be the last. See also: Monster Children.

How long did this gig last?

This lasted until the team employed to sell advertising in Cinq couldn’t, and I was turfed into the world of freelancing.

Do you have any stories about rollercoasters? I like stories about rollercoasters?

Years passed and I rode the rollercoaster of freelance writing.

I also like stories of scandalous love, pimps and prostitutes. Got any of those to share with us?

I worked part-time, then fulltime, at Borders. Fell in love with a married woman. Moved into a suburb where prostitutes would regularly fight with their pimps outside my window (“Why did you have to shoot him?!”).

How good would you say life was at that time?

Life was good.

And then?

Then came the call again: a fulltime job managing a team of people to produce web content on a ridiculous budget, to be sold to big companies for a ridiculous price. Out of fear of being litigated by one very large organisation that bought from us, I shall omit the finer details. Suffice it to say, I witnessed the worst in some people while in this job. It made me question my craft. I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion…

But I digress. 

That did sound like a bit of a digression of Haueresque proportions. Anyway. So what did you do? And do you have any more rollercoaster stories?

I quit. I dove into freelance life, and once again the rollercoaster began.

Oh no. Were things different this time?

This time, I was armed with a camera. And a shitload of experience shooting some of the world’s top music acts; interviewing some of the world’s most inspiring musicians and actors; and armed to the teeth with industry contacts.

And how is the rollercoaster of freelance work treating you these days?

My freelance ‘business’ has grown since that day - albeit with many growing pains - and now allows me to work anywhere in the world. As long as I have an internet connection, I’m always working.

 And rather than finish off with a final question, I'm going to predict that you are about to conclude with a statement I can relate to and which makes me doff my cap to you.

I've felt like a bit of a fraud most of my writing life. I may not have studied writing or journalism (I'm now a member of the Australian Journalist's Association - ZOMG!), but I have now made a career of it.
I've spoken on creative panels, giving advice to people way more educated than myself. I've quit jobs most people would step over my cold corpse to do. Most of the time I find all this hard to reconcile.

Cap doffed.Go here for more of Mark's work.

No Child, Nilaja Sun Interview, Melbourne 2013 Theatreworks

 

Nilaja Sun questions by Lee Bemrose 

I missed this performance last year. I knew nothing about Nilaja Sun at the time. I researched. I found that another play about British convicts  transported to Australia (Our Country's Good) played a big role in her highly successful solo performance that began as a modest off-Broadway show.

It's a first hand account of a teacher's experiences with the education system in modern America, Nilaja plays an array of characters with minimal set and costume which is made up for in talent. Audinces are flocking to it and critics the world over are raving about it. By all accounts, a wonderfully dramatic and comical performance, I don't intend to miss it again.

Your use of the play Our Country's Good in No Child is intriguing. Was that play somehow inspirational for your work or did you decide to draw on it while creating No Child?

I used the play Our Country’s Good as a great example of people who feel imprisoned while also creating theatre and art. It may not be a play that I would teach at this young early age of 14-16 but it highlighted the struggles of my students and how they’re similar to the struggles of the convicts of Australia in 1788.

Our Country's Good dealt with breaking down oppressive discipline and instilling convicts with dignity and a sense of self worth... how similar or dissimilar are the themes in No Child?

Very similar. The theme of infusing the children with dignity, self worth and empathy is something that’s always been very close to my heart as a teacher and in reading Our Country’s Good I was inspired by the hope it brought thematically.

You must be pretty happy with how well No Child has been received by both critics and audiences. Did you have any idea it was going to be quite so successful?

No, no idea. I wrote the play to be performed on off Broadway for a four week run and then to be on my way in someone else’s play. But alas, fate would have it, here I am 700 shows later in beautiful Australia.

Have you talked to school-aged audiences after they have seen the show? If so,what have reactions generally been like?

Yes. I try to make sure to set up a post show discussion with every high school group that sees the show so that all of the kids have a well rounded theatre experience especially if it’s their first show. It is an extremely lively experience to witness high-schoolers witnessing No Child.

You drew on your years of experience in the public school sector to create this work, yet there is a lot of humour in it. Was there much laughter in the schools in real life?

Even more laughter. Our kids are extremely funny particularly when they trust you enough to open up.

In fact, the more you read about what bad shape the public school system is in America, humour seems at face value out of place when dealing with such a topic. Your thoughts?

Not from where I see it. I’m working with the kids as individuals not as a national crisis that many politicians might see them as. They are all beautiful, filled with life and fully human and so it is up to me to mirror their humanity in its most rounded shape.

Works like this are a great way of drawing attention to a situation. Do you think they can actually affect things and make a difference?

Yes I do. Perhaps it’s not a global difference or national difference or even a state wide difference but I genuinely feel that when teachers see themselves portrayed on stage in that hour they get a moment to breathe and laugh and cry and thus refresh themselves for the next day or even year of school – and that seems pretty revolutionary to me.

Have things gotten better or worse since you were moved to create No Child?

I would say, in many ways it has stayed the same however this new administration sees the value not only in students improved performance but also values great teachers. Ask me again in 10 years.

How difficult is it to address what is a very serious issue while creating a work of entertainment?

This piece of theatre reflects a great part of my life that I enjoy and I honour and so it was not a great challenge and plus I’m an entertainer at heart.

The title alludes to a Bush policy on education... how political is your play?

Oddly No Child speaks of this policy in one sentence of the play, the piece is more emotionally political.

Who do you find responds best to No Child?

The New York Times wrote “Teachers will love no child” and I’ve always found that anyone who is an educator and who loves and appreciates educators will love no child as it applauds the greatness in the teacher.

Which are your favourite characters to play and why?

As an actor when I am performing I am completely “being” each character so therefore I love whoever I am at the moment and have no favourites.

Do you have a favourite line from the play that sums up the essence of the play?

As a playwright I see the importance in every single word said and every word unsaid.

Read my review on Australian Stage here.


 Theatre works, 14 Acland Street, St Kilda
 Date: 07 May 2013 - 26 May 2013
Time: Tues-Sat at 8:00pm Wed & Thurs at 1:00pm Sun at 5:00pm
Price: $45 full / $35 conc & under 30 / $40 Groups 10+ [plus booking fee]

No Child...
Written and Performed by Nilaja Sun
Directed by Hal Brooks

Grumpy With Friends: Rory Satori

By Lee Bemrose

“Dark psy for me is the ultimate dancefloor music. The drive and power it has is perfect for long energetic dancefloor sessions. It is music that is not about social interaction or standing around bopping away with a beer in your hand, but about full trance experience. It really allows me to go deep inside myself, leave my mind behind and lead with my soul.”

Several years ago I struck up a conversation with a random person on a dancefloor in Sydney. Her name was Kobie, and she was the DJ's girlfriend. The DJ was playing a live set of dark psy.

The girl's name is still Kobie, she is still Rory's girlfriend, but since then they have relocated to Byron Bay, Rory has released numerous tracks as well as his own album, Revolved, and together Rory and Kobie have brought baby Arlo into the world.

What were you doing before you sat down to answer these questions?

I was just walking around my property picking dandelion flowers to prepare for a floral wine. Oh, and dealing with a teething baby.

When did you adopt the name Satori, and what were your reasons for doing it?

I first came across the concept of Satori while reading a book about Zen Buddhism, at the same time my partner was reading a fantasy novel where the main character was named Satori. In Zen Buddhism, satori refers to the experience of Kensho, or seeing into one’s true nature. It is often translated as a sudden, momentary glimpse of enlightenment.

This was the idea I wanted to convey through my music. I love the way that dancing for hours in the middle of the bush can help you work through things and can lead to many little awakenings and I really needed to help facilitate that for others through my music.

Are you a Buddhist?

No. I have had interest in religions but purely out of curiosity. I would consider myself agnostic; I don’t think anyone really has all the answers. I would actually be happy if all religion was wiped from the earth tomorrow and we just started from scratch, simply living in harmony with each other and nature. We seem to have a real need to be told what to think and it would be great if we could collectively rise above that and start thinking for ourselves.

You moved from Sydney to the far north NSW coast a couple of years ago. What prompted that move?
I was working in Sydney as a gardener, it was real heavy labour type work, and I decided I wanted more from life than that. I wanted to go and study something, so I decided to study Medicinal Science with the goal to be an Osteopath. There are only three schools in Australia that teach Osteopathy, two are in Melbourne and the other is in Lismore. Originally I was going to go to Melbourne because I just love that city and having spent four years there I was missing it. But Sydney kind of wore me out, it’s such a fast paced life living in a city and both Kobie and I decided we wanted a shift in the pace, so we chose to come to the northern rivers. 

How are you finding life up there?

I love it! We live on a few acres in the hills behind Byron Bay, we have 10 chickens, an orchard and vege garden. There are koalas in our backyard, echidnas, all sorts of snakes, bandicoots and possums. We have views over the Nightcap Ranges which is home to some of the most magical pristine pockets of wilderness I have ever seen. It is an amazing place to live. It’s hard when it comes to earning a living though, not much work here. But that’s all right if you can live cheaply and don’t have any vices.

What's the doof scene like up there right now?

There has been some serious trouble at doofs in this region for the last few years. Basically there is nothing for young kids to do around here so they go to doofs. It’s amazing how young the crowds are up here. The violence is a big problem. There has been a lot of stabbings, lots of robberies and lots of predatory behaviour. It has kind of become too much. I mean, an AK47 was pulled out at a new years party in 2011/12!
I wouldn’t feel safe taking my family to most doofs in this region, but there are exceptions and lately I have heard some good things have been happening, so there is still hope. Everything goes in cycles and I hope it returns to the once loving party scene it was.

You've had a recent addition to the family. Do you manage to get out to party or play much at the moment?

I am still taking a few bookings to play, but that is really the only time I get out to doofs these days. I am really looking forward to taking Arlo (my son) to a party. I think his first one will be Moontopia in QLD at the end of this year.

How has being a new father affected your production output? Do you still produce as much as you did before fatherhood?

Surprisingly I have written some of my best music since he was born. It’s all written late at night with headphones on, but I think my output is still the same, if not better than before he was born. It’s hard to juggle uni, a family, and an artistic pursuit but with some good time management it can be done. You have to really use your time wisely when you have a child so if anything it has made me more productive overall.

I hear Arlo gets into your dark psy. Is he still into it?

Ha! Yes, he loves it. He can be screaming wildly and I’ll put on the fastest, most crazy darkpsy I can find and he just zones right out. If I put on prog he screams louder. Definitely not a fan of prog.

What other styles of music does he react to and what are those reactions?

I sat down with him one day just after he was born and started running through styles of music. He likes melodic psy, stuff like Talpa, and he really likes folk music. He seemed to be a bit spun out by jazz, I put on some Miles Davis and he started to look around with a strange expression and act all scattered. But most other styles really calm him down these days. He is a natural music lover! It’s been a real buzz watching a human hear music for the first time.

What other styles of music are you into, both for listening pleasure and production?

I’m a big jazz fan. I love moody, psychedelic jazz like Yusef Lateef or Rashan Roland Kirk. I also really love folk music. Artists like Nick Drake, Arlo Guthrie (my sons’ namesake) and Neil Young. There is a heap of great music coming out of the U.S under the Neo-Folk banner that has been exciting me lately, bands like Bowerbirds, Iron & Wine and Andrew Bird. But pretty much any genre has its gold and I can appreciate any style as long as it is made with creativity.

Why does dark psy do it for you more than other styles of music?

Dark psy for me is the ultimate dancefloor music. The drive and power it has is perfect for long energetic dancefloor sessions. It is music that is not about social interaction or standing around bopping away with a beer in your hand, but about full trance experience. It really allows me to go deep inside myself, leave my mind behind and lead with my soul. It’s all about balance though, I really feel the need for the melodic side of psy after a good night stomp.

When did your love affair with music begin and what brought it about?

I was immersed in music from birth. My father has this amazing record collection, lots of old jazz, blues and rock. I grew up listening to some really obscure music from the 60s and I became obsessed with those records. I remember sitting there reading the covers and memorising the artists. That music from my early years was such an important part of my life. I don’t understand people who don’t like music. In fact I don’t trust people who tell me they don’t like music.

Judging from some recent comments from you, I would assume that you're a bit jaded with the psytrance scene. Is that a correct assumption?

It is I guess. I feel it has lost a lot of its original intention. It seems to be more about getting messy these days. It used to be about the cathartic experience the music could facilitate. It was primal. The music has become a bit stale for me, I don’t see much innovation in the Australian psytrance scene. We seem to like dubstep and glitch hop a bit too much as well. But there are still parties that I feel are getting it right and I still love getting out and having a weekend at a doof, just got to pick the right ones these days.You've put on many parties in the past. Any intentions of doing it again in the future?

There has been talk with a friend of throwing one up here to try and combat the lack of anything experimental and psychedelic. I hope it comes about.

What occupies your time when you are not making music? I think you are studying and making booze and cheese, correct?

Correct. I have been making cheese, and trying my hand at brewing beer and wine. Study takes up a lot of my time but when I can I try to get out into nature and do a bit of bush walking and camping. I am also very keen on growing vegies, and I have a bonsai collection so gardening also takes up a bit of my time.

We've had a few robust discussions about conspiracy theories and the state of the world. I'm curious about how you feel about bringing a new human into the world given the state it's in.

For many years I was adamant I would not have a child because I saw the world as hopeless. I thought bringing a child into this world would be cruel. But then I started seeing friends have children and watching them raise very conscious, aware children made me realise that the world's hope lies in the hand of the next generation and the best thing I could do for the world was to instil my child with the knowledge of how to live in harmony with nature and all Earth's inhabitants.I am actually very hopeful about the state of the world right now. I see revolution happening everywhere. It is an exciting time to be alive.

When writers write or painters paint, it's often to express certain feelings or convey certain messages. Music can do the same, but it can also be more abstract. It can be more an ornamental thing, the stuff we dance to. What does music mean to you? What motivates you to make music?

Music is life for me, I couldn’t imagine existence without it. It can give me energy, bring me to tears or lull me to sleep. Certain songs can transport me through time to a place I once stood, or to a future I can envision. I have always used music creation as a way to tell my story and release my creative essence. I just feel a real need to write music and I don’t think it will ever stop.

I like listening to the occasional track of yours, but for the dancefloor it's too fast for me. Are you ever tempted by less BPMs?

I try to write slower psytrance occasionally, but the tempo always creeps up to about 170 bpm. Whenever I write any other style of psy it’s not long before it has transformed into superfast darkpsy. I’m not sure why that is.

And as I finish writing that question I'm listening to one of your chill tracks, Peace Of Mind. Love it. Do you make many chill tunes?

Yes, I have been experimenting making some slower, more abstract tunes. I want to create a kind of lush, cinematic, dreamy deep techno project sometime in the future.

As a creator of good music, how much do you hate dubstep? Or are you one of those misguided people who thinks dubstep is good? Not being biased here, I just... yeah, biased as hell. I just don't get dubstep.

Haha! I’m with you there, not a fan of dubstep. I dislike glitch hop even more. There is some stuff I like that would be more in the ‘bass music’ genre, like Burial or Marina Faib, but generally I cannot stand dubstep.

Do you get out on the dancefloor yourself? Who do you like to dance to?

Yes, I love dancing. If I am at a party I will spend 90% of the time on the dancefloor if the tunes are good. Music-wise I like intelligent programming. I have had amazing dance experiences to international artists like Kindzadza, Penta, Electrypnose, and Kashyyk.

On the local front Dark Nebula never disappoints.

What are your plans for the future, both musically and personally?

I am currently writing my second album, and have a couple of compilation releases planned for the next few months. I hope to keep building my music career and get overseas at some point to perform. want to finish my degree and see where that takes me. I want to spend as much quality time being in love with my girlfriend Kobie and my son Arlo. I want to re-connect with nature, and build towards a self-sustaining future for my family. And I want to be happy and live a simple life amongst the trees.

Grumpy With Friends: Bird

Grumpy With Sarah Bird Lewis-Hammond

“I’ve kind of always been on ‘the writing journey’ but not necessarily always been writing. I have an incredibly prolific internal narrator who has spent the last thirty squillion years turning my everyday life into some kind of pseudo-noir half-arsed semiotic analysis of sitting on a bus and going to the shop.”

My friendship with Sarah – or Bird as she is known to her friends – came out of the blue when I was an editor of dance music mag 3D World. Hers was one of the many submissions I received asking to contribute to the magazine. Her first Acid Tongue column was, from memory, well written and came from a very personal place. I emailed to say yeah sure, I like it, but do you want to tone it down at all. I would find out that Bird is an all or nothing person.

The emails continued. A friendship was brewing. Quite a special one. I clearly remember the day the editor sitting across the desk from me asked what I was laughing about this time, and I said “It's this Bird person. I have to meet her.”

We met after countless, rambling, hilarious emails. Turned out I'd been walking past her twice a day; she worked in a pub just around the corner from my office. We went out. We got slaughtered. We laughed a lot. She moved in with The Dreaded One and me for a while. Eventually she continued her travels and went back to the UK and the rest of her life.

Ten years have gone by since that first random email. We've had our ups and downs, had our misunderstandings, have enjoyed a laugh or two. Much has changed in that time. What has remained constant is the essence of Bird. She is an impressive character and a wonderful human being.

You're a busy person, Sarah Bird Lewis-Hammond. What is this interview interrupting right now?

You are interrupting the following: Tweeting for the UK Crowdfunding Association; looking at an initial plan for my second novel; wondering why I’m not working on my first novel; drinking a glass of red wine (something Italian, can’t remember the grape but also not about to get up to check. Oh but my glass is empty. Hang on. Nero D’Avola Frappato.); swooning after a mental few days with an ill and clingy 15 month old; complaining that my tongue hurts; eating a chocolate chip cookie; trying to figure out when to write the renewable energy investment newsletter that needs to be sent to the editor tomorrow when it’s already 10:30pm. Also thinking about knitting an R2D2 outfit for my daughter.

What do you tell people you do when they ask you what you do?

It depends who it is. At the moment I tend to mumble a few things and hope they lose interest. The mumble goes something like this: I was a journalist specialising in environmental issues, then I did an MA in creative writing and then I had a baby. At the moment I’m half-stay-at-home mumming, half-writing for a company that does work around renewable energy investment, and half-finishing my first novel. But I also do stuff like run writing workshops in Brighton and look for a girlfriend for my brother. It’s all a little shambolic right now.

What do people think you do?

Fuck around on Facebook.

What do you actually do?

Fuck around on Facebook and Twitter.

You didn't study journalism or writing in your university years, did you? What did you study?

Non. My undergrad was in maths and I got a well-deserved third. I was shit at it from the beginning so I think I should get an award for sticking it out

Before embarking on this writing journey (does that sound wanky? Writing journey?), where was your career headed? And how happy with your work/life were you at that stage?

After I graduated I got a job building websites and I proper hated it. I was miserable, my career was heading nowhere and I reached a point of near meltdown. Most days were spent in a dissociative state of fury and angst. It took me a while but I realised it was all a little daft and completely avoidable so I jumped on a plane and drunk some buckets on the Koh San Road with other over-privileged whities, sat on some beaches and on top of some mountains and did some Serious Thinking and realised that in my fantasy best future I hung around writing cool stuff and reading cool stuff and talking about both the writing and the reading. Actually making a living out of being a fiction writer seemed completely impractical so I hit upon journalism as an idea. I continued my cliché of a Grand Tour and headed to Sydney, whereupon I stumbled across your sorry arse and you foolishly started paying me to write shit. It transpired that I’m not that great at journalism and making a living out of reading and writing and talking fiction might not be quite so crazy after all so after the world’s most circuitous route I’m gradually heading over that way.

How happy are you now compared to then?

Immeasurably. It’s like different lives. Things are gradually slotting into place and although stuff doesn’t always work out, and the choices I make means things are sometimes tough, I can look back on how miserable I was and know why I can’t compromise on what is most important to me.

For someone with a non-journalistic background, you've had some pretty impressive achievements. Tell us a bit about those achievements and what they have meant to you.

Errr, I dunno if they are impressive to be honest. More luck, good timing and steam-rolling into things without thinking. I started a magazine on a whim because my ex-boss had pissed me off and I saw a gap in the market left by my ex-ex-boss. It was a financial disaster but was bought up at the last minute by the local rag. That gave me the opportunity to do some pretty cool stuff. I started an environment section in that local rag, which at the time was one of the first of its kind and I won an award for that. I didn’t win it because I was a great journalist, I won it because I was the only person doing that particular thing at the time. In subsequent years, when others started picking up on how big green news was getting, I wasn’t even shortlisted. I also started a local award scheme for grassroots environmental achievement, which was wicked fun and really valuable but, again, a financial disaster so it couldn’t carry on which I still think is a real shame. Then I applied for the creative writing MA on a whim because I had a conversation with someone during which we both whinged about how we weren’t writing as much as we want and I thought that was pretty pathetic and wanted to change it. I applied because I wanted to be able to say at least I had tried. It was a surprise that I not only got on the course but won a bursary from a literary agency, so that was all pretty excellent.

In terms of what it’s meant to me, I’m a little on the insecure side and need constant validation, so winning things is like yay! I can carry on! And then not winning things is like no! I need to hide under a duvet and cry! The MA thing has been both the biggest confidence boost and crusher ever. It’s very competitive so getting on it was all yay! I’m actually pretty good at this! But then I was surrounded by these phenomenally talented people which made me all no! I’m really shite at this!

How long have you been an environmentalist?

I wouldn’t really call myself an environmentalist. It’s a default state for anyone who lives on the planet and quite likes it. You wouldn’t call someone who likes breathing and wants to carry on breathing a breathalist, you’d just call them a person. It’s the same thing. I like the environment and want to carry on living in it thanksverymuch.

Having said that, it was probably around 2003 – 2004 when I started thinking about ‘the environment’ in less abstract terms. I had seen a lot of human impact in otherwise wild places and also started writing for a local hippie magazine. I wrote an article about carbon offsetting and although it’s not really a practical solution the lateral thinking really caught my attention. It built from there and I got a bit hooked on the science of the solutions. Human imagination at its best.

It kind of goes in phases to be honest. Right now I’m not so interested in doing my recycling and I’ve just got a new car which I love so I’m not exactly the model greenie, but I’m really into the potential of renewable energy and next-gen finance to drive it forward. I’m also really interested in the way we represent climate change in media and literature and the way our written culture impacts on the social and political discourse.

Among my friends I have a couple who absolutely deny that humanity is having any significant impact on climate change. What would you say to those people?

Nothing. I’ve got more interesting conversations to have with more interesting people.

I’m not a campaigner but if I was I would direct my campaign to where the most impact can be made, and that certainly isn’t wasting energy shouting at people who aren’t going to change their minds.

What shape do you think humanity is in right now. Any hope for us?

Things are a little wobbly around the edges, and some days it certainly seems as though we’re heading straight towards some kind of epic implosion but it’s also a very interesting time. Human imagination is genuinely awe-inspiring. At the moment, I spend a lot of time researching the expansion of renewable energy capacity and output. There is a lot of positivity that isn’t reported because We’re All Going To Die is a much better headline. Unsubsidised solar and wind power are now cheaper than subsidised gas and coal in some parts of the world. That’s big news. I mean, that is proper massive. While there are plenty of other serious issues, I think cracking clean, cheap, renewable energy is the key so I’m in an optimistic phase right now. If nothing else, we’ll beat it by sheer force of numbers. I mean, wiping out 10 billion of us fuckers is gonna be a tough job.

How long have you written fiction? Did you dream of being a fiction writer as a kid?

My turn to wank! No wait. My turn to sound wanky. I’ve kind of always been on ‘the writing journey’ but not necessarily always been writing. I have an incredibly prolific internal narrator who has spent the last thirty squillion years turning my everyday life into some kind of pseudo-noir half-arsed semiotic analysis of sitting on a bus and going to the shop. It’s only really been in the last ten years that I started seriously putting it down in pixels.

Somewhere I’ve got a few stories I wrote as a teenager, there are a few diaries and notebooks kicking around. As a kid I think I wanted to be a research chemist and then a waitress and then a computer programmer and then a dinosaur. I didn’t dream of being a fiction writer but I was a big reader and remember getting to the end of books and thinking ‘I’m totally going to do one of those one day’.

So when did you start taking fiction writing seriously?

I think it was about 2002 or 2003 when I finally sat down and wrote a story that I didn’t think was awful. Before then I knew what it was I wanted to do but really struggled to put a shape to it, if that made any sense, so I spent a lot of time writing very long and wistful emails to people that somehow sated the hunger but without providing any actual nutrition. I kept all the emails in the same way I’ve got all my dairies and notebooks but stupid Yahoo deleted them a couple of years ago. It was devastating.

And where are you at now with fiction?

Frustrated. I feel like I’ve been working on this novel forever and I just want to get it finished and published and have a couple of people read it and tell me what they think and then move on to the next thing. But also elated, it’s now part of my life in a way that really was only a dream a few years ago.

Can you tell us anything about the novel?

It’s the story of a young woman whose terminally ill, estranged step-father asks for her help getting to a suicide clinic in Europe. There’s some shit about bridges and flowers too.

You're furthering your education, aren't you. Or doing something university-ie? Something to do with something I'll never have anything to do with. (I don't even know how to spell PHD). What's happening there?

Ummm nowt at the moment. I want to study the way climate change is represented in contemporary fiction and the way that feeds back into the popular culture on the subject, and whether our rampant anthropocentrism is actually the key to behaviour change. But there are many complexities involved in going back to uni at this particular juncture.

Why do that when you can just, you know, write?

Two reasons: Firstly, because I can’t just write. I have to make a living as well. Realistically, I’m not going to make a living out of writing fiction, but I could make a living out of writing fiction and lecturing about fiction and writing the occasional overwrought academic paper.

Secondly, because it’s really all part of the same thing. The more I know about stuff the better writer I am.

Tell us about family life and what impact it is having on your writing endeavours.

Being a mum is pretty much the best thing ever but I am fucking knackered from the minute I wake up to the minute I go to bed. In one respect having a kid has been very positive for my writing because it’s forced me into a strict routine and made me focus on my goals, but in another respect it’s been a bit crap as I’m fucking knackered all the time. It’s also very motivating in that I want my daughter to think I’m awesome, which means I have to make myself awesome.

What's your favourite Edie moment so far?

It’s all been pretty cool (mostly). Just watching someone start from scratch and figure stuff out is incredibly compelling. If I had to pick one thing it would probably be a few weeks before Christmas when she had just learn to walk. We went to a cafe by the ice rink with some friends and Edie was running around grinning at random people, squealing at the little penguins that kids use to hold them up on the ice. It was all very festive and lovely but that wasn’t what was so great, it was the first time she wasn’t a little baby anymore and while that was sad in its own way it also felt full of a glorious potential.

Your favourite Toby moment?

It’s all been pretty cool (mostly). There’s so many times he’s made me laugh till I thought I was going to die. And just being a family is great. Also he made me a cup of tea the other day that was particularly delish.

Writing-wise, what are your goals for the next 12 months, five years, 10 years?

I’ve only got one goal at the moment and that’s to finish my novel by September of this year. Nothing else really exists at the moment.

How confident are you in achieving that goal?

Meh. I am riddled with insecurity but with a completely idealistic undercurrent of absolute certainty that everything will fall into place. So, you know, it will either happen or not, and either way I’ll be right.

You must have times of doubt. What keeps you going through those times?

If I’m writing and I’ve spent more than thirty minutes thinking I’m writing a big pile of shit I’ll walk away and come back to it later. If I still think it’s shit a few days later it gets sent to the great Word document in the sky. I once asked Ali Smith (who I totally adore) the same question and she shrugged and said “You just have to ignore it”. It seemed so clear cut for her, and for some reason that really enabled me to be better at ignoring the doubt. You have to be stubborn otherwise nothing ever gets done, and you have to think about it as a job. No other occupation would allow you to swoon at your laptop for three weeks. There are deadlines and they have to be met.

Toby is also fantastic when I’m full of drama about how terrible it all is. He’s a creative type too so he really gets the necessity of the occasional flap and always has the right thing to say.

You'll probably hate this question, but creatively, who are some of your biggest inspirations?

I hate this question. The minute anyone asks me I suddenly forget EVERYTHING. I guess my main source of cultural input is text-based: books, articles, blogs, etc. I’m not a huge consumer of music or visual arts because I think I’m probably dead on the inside. At the moment I’m really into magical realism in a Salman Rushdie kind of way, and also realism that seems very magical in a Colum McCann kind of way. In terms of storylines I get a lot of ideas from real life, things people tell me, situations that arise. I’m a chronic asker of “what if?” and a perpetual creator of drama, although I try to keep that mostly to my fiction these days. In general I have quite visual ideas of how I want things to sound when they’re read and how I want them to make people feel, which I guess doesn’t really make a huge amount of sense.

What advice would you give to a younger you? You pick the age.

Stop being a twat. Age < 30

What was the last thing that made you LOL?

Someone I know posted some conspiracy thing on Facebook about why the Pope resigned, and it stated as a well known fact that the Queen regularly makes human sacrifices at Balmoral.

Now that you have finished these questions, what are you about to do?

Go to bed. Cold sheets are the best.