Saturday, March 12, 2016

Hug Etiquette

So Kafka Woman now works in the cafe. Remember her? She is indeed a beautiful woman and a serene soul. A random and fleeting encounter, and now we are in contact on an almost daily basis.

It's all very wonderful, really - except for  The Crisis Of The Hug.

Normally with hugs, I like them and I indulge in them frequently with old friends. Usually you hug a friend when you see them after not seeing them for a long time, and then you hug them again at the end of that meeting, knowing that you might not see them for another long time. Granted, that period of time might only be a week or so, but hey, hugs are cool.

Kafka Woman is not an old friend. There was what some people would call "a connection" on the first day we met. Then she was looking for some work and after a while we had some work for her. At the end of the first day of work, she put her arms up for a hug. We hugged. It was an end of the day, thank you hug.

Next day, Kafka Woman came in and gave me a good morning hug. She gives good hug, btw. Cool, I thought, because it's the second day and this is a second day good morning hug.

The day went well and she is a pleasure to work with. At the end of her shift, we had another hug. Which s great. I love the hug. Especially when the huggee is so beautiful and serene and when the hug is all about appreciating that they need the work and we appreciate the help.

Third day in, more hug action. And this is where I start to wonder... did one of us accidentally initiate a hug policy that the other one is a bit confused about? Are we both thinking that we have to hug the other one because the other one thinks we have to hug? Should I find something else to do at the assumed moment of hug so that they realise we don't actually have to hug? Then again, what if they really do want to hug... what if these hugs are really important to them and me trying to act preoccupied causes offense?

Fourth day in, we hug hello and we hug goodbye. Customers see us hugging. Then I wonder if Badaboom Beverley sees us hugging. Badaboom Beverley and I also hug, but just usually on special occasions. But I torment myself with the thought that BB then starts to think that I am hugsnubbing her. Why doesn't he hug me twice a day, she might ponder Frenchly.

You probably think I'm trying to be funny here, but I'm not. It's all actually quite awkward.

Then again, Kafka Woman hugs The Dreaded One each day too, so maybe I just need to loosen the fuck up.

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