Friday, August 10, 2007

Happy August 9


Your senses heighten. This is extreme. The best. Emotion becomes almost more than you can bear. Best feeling ever. Total bodymindfuckwow.

Then black. Really black. Just nothing.

More time than you are aware of.

Then white. Really white. Just white and alien voices. Tubes. Machinery. Numb kind of pain. Vague understanding that the aliens are angels.

Or nurses.

Did I mention the confusion? The lack of memory? The total absence of self? Who you are, it's just not there.

Some memory.

Gaps.

And then maybe it tumbles in and it turns out you are a lucky one. You've survived because someone loves you and because strangers have done their job.

That and a whole lot more was August 9 a handful of years ago. Is it five? I think it's five.

Have been living on borrowed time ever since.

PS - six years from now the full Men's Health article will be published on Your Friends House.

6 comments:

meva said...

Glad you're here with us still.

EmmaK said...

very intriguing...and oddly positive, like, the human spirit can overcome everything...even what happened to you back then. Cheered me up, bizarrely!

Quick said...

Thanks Meva. Me too.

Glad it made you feel that way Emma. I posted a longer, more detailed account as it appeared in Men's Health a couple of years ago but took it down a day later. There's a lot in that account but ultimately the message is positive and life affirming.

Not sure I agree with you about the human spirit overcoming everything. I was just very lucky, that's all. Am very lucky.

Kathryn said...

You were meant to stay here longer. We need your writing. Very inspiring. Somewhat sad but I like that.

P.S. You're funny, too. Am happy 9 Aug didn't get the best of you. :)

bohémienne said...

However you choose to live, your life is likely more full than ever, partly because of that experience. Good to remember once in a while, I'm sure.

Quick said...

You'll find this funny Kat. A girl I once knew called Mirrella Zannella (no I am not joking) told me, "You have the saddest eyes I've ever seen." First time anyone said that and it was a bit of a shock, but seeing the sadness in the stories I guess it shouldn't have surprised me. I dunno. I think I've always written my best stuff when feeling melancholy... except if I'm writing silly stuff or twisted stuff.

Anyway, I appreciate your words.

Yes, Bohemienne, that's it exactly. I don't dwell on it but I do think of it from time to time, and always around that date. Dancing in the sunshine, sound of a cello, sight of a full moon, sharing a laugh with a stranger, hug of a friend... and I say cheers cosmos for letting me have this.