Sunday, March 15, 2009

HALPHONE

My new phone... I'm calling it HAL.

Friends are coming around for dinner tomorrow night. One of them asked what she should bring. I started to write back "Just bring a bottle of wine."

HAL had other ideas. I like predictive text, but this was taking things to new levels. I got as far as "Just bring" and HAL suggested "some".

I got curious about what HAL had in mind and accepted "some".

HAL's next suggestion was "ppl".

Curiouser and curiouser, accepted ppl. The next predictive suggestion popped up: "around".

I really wanted to know what HAL had in mind so I accepted this and the next suggestion was "for".

I'd gone this far, what the hal? Next suggestion? "dinner".

So I had been going to write "Just bring a bottle of wine", but my phone in all its hospitality generosity had typed out "Just bring some ppl around for dinner."

How does that work? How does it manage to string a sentence together like that? Why is it so generous?

And how the fuck did it know I was planning to have friends over for dinner and not lunch? Has it been eavesdropping on my conversations?

Creepy, man, really creepy.

8 comments:

Gin said...

Perhaps HAL is carnivorous and wanted to eat ppl for dinner.

Lee Bemrose said...

I asked him about that but he assured me he is vegetarian. Do you think he's lying to me?

Gin said...

Next the predictive text will start typing "Daisy, daisy, give me your answer do. I'm half crazy all for the love of you..."

Lee Bemrose said...

Oh I hope so, Pure Gin, because I will definitely give my phone a good talking too if that's what it comes up with.

Lee Bemrose said...

To, even.

Y said...

Have you managed to turn HAL off yet?

Anonymous said...

U always make me smile........yr the best study break ever - now if only we cld magically be off at the same time and smile together

Lee Bemrose said...

No, Y, I kinda like HAL. He amuses the shit out of me. Just so long as he doesn't start getting menacing.

It does seem to require a bit of magic, doesn't it Boopy. Ridiculous, really. (Now get back to your studying).