Thursday, September 28, 2006

Walk The Walk

Last night I met a friend at the pub. She's visiting from OS, was drinking with friends, a couple I haven't met. Big hug from her. Really good to see her. Checked that everyone was right for drink because it was almost closing (I'd come straight from a play). Walked inside, got drinks and came back out onto the landing. One of the other guys came over and told me that one of the girls I hadn't met had watched me walk away, then told them that I "have a really sexy walk for a guy."

Um... do you know what that kind of thing does to you? Just in case you've never been told by a stranger that you have a sexy walk, I'll tell you what it does to you. It makes you laugh and joke about practising and you brush it off. But you look at the girl who said it and you just kind of repeat the phrase to yourself. Then you say to your girlfriend, "See?" with a thumb to the chest. "Sexy walk. Me. And I wasn't even trying. Lucky you." Then you don't want to get up from the table because you know everyone is going to be checking out this sexy walk of yours. And you think how is it sexy? What the hell am I doing that someone thinks I have a sexy walk? Was it just a freak bit of walking or is my regular walk sexy? Maybe I just swivelled my hips to negotiate around a table. Or maybe it really is just a sexy walk. Is it just her or do people in the street every day go phwoar - check out the way he walks... sex-eee...

And then the next day you get really retarded and start walking around with that Bee Gee's song in your head. "Aaaaaahhhh... well you can tell by the way I use my walk, I'm a woman's man, no time for talk..." And you look around to see if anyone is noticing the way you walk. And you check yourself in shop windows because you really want to know what it is about this one foot in front of the other business that makes a person say it's sexy.

Re. Tard.

"Aaaaah... well you can tell by the way I use my walk..."

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

love that song. great post. big laughs.

Gin said...

I've been told before I have a sexy handshake. How can a handshake be sexy? But I understand your thought process all the same...

Lola Lopez said...

I'm too sexy for my skirt...

Lee Bemrose said...

Ha. Sexy handshake. Classic. That would have the same effect. Like, what the fuck?

Good friend just called from New Zealand. Told her about the walk thing, said I'd been singing Bee Gees and trying to catch a surprise glimpse of my walk in shop windows because of it. She pissed herself laughing (we spend a lot of time laughing at my expense), then straightened up and said, "No, seriously - you DO actually have a really cool way of walking."

Bloody hell. It's not something I've ever worked on, so it must be a hereditary thing. My father and his father before him... my God - my Granddad is probably a sexy walker too. boggles the mind.

neena maiya (guyana gyal) said...

Yeah, that Bee Gee's song was going in my head as I read this.

I crack up the way guys swoon at compliments :-)

Gee, now I want to check out your walk too.

Lee Bemrose said...

GG - You don't know the meaning of swoon... unless you have seen my swoon walk :)