Friday, July 04, 2008

Eye-ronic

I've been talking to The Cosmos a lot recently, my theory being that if I make friends with it, it will be good to me. Each time a nice thing happens to me I say, "Thank you, Cosmos, that was a very cool thing you just did for me and I appreciate it a lot."

And if a shitty thing happens to me I figure it's better not to point the finger of blame at The Cosmos (which would be pretty difficult anyway, when you think about it) but to accept that it was my fault and I had a shitty thing coming: "Ah - fair enough, Cosmos, I did that shitty thing the other day so I had a shitty thing coming my way. My bad."

Sitting here just now I've just realised what an ironic sense of humour The Cosmos can have. Some time ago I realised my vision was not as perfect as it once was so I had my eyes tested. I needed reading glasses. Then recently my left eye developed something called Central Serous Retinopathy, an annoying condition that in most cases goes away by itself after a few months.

The irony at play here is that it is now pointless wearing my reading glasses because although they improve the vision in my right eye, they magnify the shadowy distortion in my left eye... "Ha ha, Cosmos, good one. What a wicked sense of humour. Funny fucker, you are... love your work. So ironic. Love it. Brilliant."

4 comments:

Z said...

I wear one contact lens, so that I can see long distances with one eye and read with the other one.

Otherwise, I'd remove a lens from the reading glasses, but that might be harder for your brain to cope with. Eye patch?

Y said...

Now is the time to revive the monocle, I say!

Lee said...

Now we're talking - an eye patch in the bad eye and a monocle in the good eye. Perfect.

Guyana-Gyal said...

And I thought it was the doctor goofing up!

An eye patch and a monocle...I'm laughing too hard..........